Parenting can be the toughest assignment on earth, but it can also be the most rewarding. What a privilege and opportunity to help shape the next generation!

Ask AunT 








     Trinette Collier Greene








Q: My husband is a sports enthusiast. He’s pretty much watching or attending sports events year round. His favorite sports are football and basketball and I’m finding myself competing, trying to get attention. He hangs with the fellas and often times they will bring their significant others to the events. I know without a doubt that he loves me. We have fun with each other and much more…I’m just not that in touch with the sports world. Am I being a whiney wife?

Signed: P.S.~Married to the Game

A: I know this scenario all too well! My husband is a sports fanatic and it seems like the seasons literally roll back to back! This is when I throw my hands up like “ I can’t win!” However, there is hope, Mrs. Wife! You are not a whiney wife and not alone. I suggest that you not compete with the world of sports…it will become exhausting and you won’t win, like that.

What you can do, if you have not already, is to schedule some days or nights to watch the games with him. I will do this because I don’t like crowds at the sports bars or it may be late games. While at home, I may order a pizza and wings (sports like foods) or make a dish. He will appreciate that and see that you are making an effort of wanting to watch the games with him. Dress up in his favorite jersey or purchase an inexpensive team shirt. I also recruited some girlfriends of mine to help understand the world of sports a little bit more!


Whatever you decide to do, make sure that it is fun and YOU are having fun. Remember to balance it. It’s ok if you don’t watch every game but be sure to do so here and there and also talk to him about taking up an interest of yours as well.

Until next time, take a moment to laugh, love, live and breathe life!

Love,
AunT

Trinette Collier Greene is a
Certified Relationship Stylist 
and
Contributing Writer



Submit your relationship questions to AskAunT@gmail.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 


To Repeat or Not to Repeat?


For anyone who’s been a parent for more than five minutes, we know that it’s tough, but an amazing job. Whether a birth, adoptive or foster parent, this role comes with tremendous responsibility, for we have the opportunity to shape future generations.

Some choose to rear their children the same way in which they were raised. Some don’t. Some had a loving, stable home with married parents. Others grew up with a stepparent. Still, others were raised in a single-parent home through the death of a spouse, divorce, or unwed parents. Sadly, some were even abused.

Our children don’t choose to be here. Our decisions as parents can often have a profound effect on them...and even on their children. Our relationship choices, our daily habits, the way we treat others, the way we handle finances: Would we want our children to emulate our current mindset & practices?

There are things in life over which we have no control, but there are others in which we have a great deal of control. The question is: To repeat, or not to repeat?

If we didn’t like our upbringing, we have an opportunity to do something different. If Dad didn’t say that he was proud of you, now that you’re a dad, you can make sure to let your child know how proud you are of him or her. If Mom didn’t hug you and say that she loved you, you can choose another path with your child.

No parent is perfect, including us. The good news is that we can count on the Lord for the wisdom needed to rear our children, and we certainly do need it. If we want better for future generations, it starts with us today. We can do it with God’s help. It’s available if we’ll only ask. So...to repeat, or not to repeat? The choice is ours.


Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer
Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It's Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)



Available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble in both paperback and eBook formats!

Be a light!
#Matthew5:16

Model P31 Fit by Bridget McCray 


A Change in Thinking

Four years ago this month, I was super-excited about the time I’d invested in myself at the gym one particular morning. Why? It’s because I was able to set FOUR personal records! So…what's the big deal about that? After all, it's just my physical body, which will ultimately die anyway. Right?

Well, yes, it will die. However, while I'm still living in it, I want to have the best quality of life that I can have for however much time I have left on this earth.

For me, the bigger issue was the battle going on in my mind. Prior to that day, I didn't THINK I could do the things I’d accomplished that morning. However, when I went then, I’d made a decision to give my best EFFORT. With God’s help and my hard work, I’d accomplished them!

So, again: What's the big deal? For me, it's that my thinking was changing. That day, there were impossibilities before me...at least, in my mind. They were unattainable no more!

I continue to realize that this does not just apply to fitness, but to EVERY area where God has called me to serve Him and serve others. Change starts in the mind!

May I ask: Is there an impossibility before YOU today? I would encourage you to give your best effort, knowing that the Father loves you and wants what's best for you. Though the process isn't always fun, know that the results will most definitely be worth the work! (Hebrews 12:11)

You CAN change your thinking; just give it a try! Here’s to a healthier you!

Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer


Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)


Available at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com in both paperback and eBook formats!

Booking Information
Please visit www.bridgetmccray.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 



Handling Disappointment

A couple of years ago, my sweet girl had had a rough day. She’d found out that she, along with a handful of others, had all been replaced for a segment involving the movement of large props in their school’s upcoming performance. She was beyond upset and shed lots of tears. I had a hard time even understanding what she was trying to say.

I reminded her that in the showcase earlier in the year, several people auditioned for the solo part, but she was the one selected to do it. I told her that though the others who’d auditioned graciously cheered her on, some of them might have been saddened that they weren't selected for the solo.

I explained that no one likes disappointment, but it is a part of life. I told her that she should ask herself what she could've done better, if anything. I also said that sometimes even our best isn't good enough in particular situations, but we can always learn something. I suggested that she keep a good attitude and cheer on the same people who cheered her on when she got the solo.

When she retold the story to her dad, in his own humorous way, he said that if the job was to move something from Point A to Point B, but it was moved to Point C, then the job wasn't done correctly, to which she chuckled and agreed. Thankfully, she "came around" and was herself again after a short time. She apologized and asked forgiveness for expressing disappointment the way she did.


Growing pains: The difficulties that can help us to become stronger, if we allow them to do so. The situation brought to mind a key life principle that day: Disappointment will come. Keep it in perspective!



Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer

Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)

Available at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com in both paperback and eBook formats!


Booking Information
Please visit www.bridgetmccray.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 



When the Answer is “No”

Not long ago, my daughter asked about having a sleepover. Even though she’d recently had one as part of her birthday celebration, she wanted to have her friends visit again.

Ordinarily, I would have had no problem with that. She does well academically and in her extracurricular activities at school. However, I’d been observing that she had become a bit lax in some of her responsibilities at home.

I told her that this time, we would pass on the sleepover. Of course, she was disappointed. She asked if she’d done anything wrong. I simply said that I found myself growing weary of repeating myself about things she knows she’s supposed to do at home. Though she felt sad, she did understand.

I explained to both her and my son that part of my job is to rear them to be responsible citizens when they grow up, God willing. Though I want them to have fun experiences, their responsibilities come first before entertainment. I am happy to accommodate their social calendars as best I can but made it clear to them that I am not required to do so.

In talking with my daughter, I put the ball in her court. I asked if there was something I said about what she’d been neglecting that was untrue. She replied there was not. I told her that I’m looking to see consistency in what she does at home, not just doing things until she gets what she wants. She understood.

I shared that part of loving her and my son is discipline and that if I didn’t love them, I wouldn’t care what they did or didn’t do. My son chimed in and said, “We’d be spoiled brats! I hate to see people (who behave) like that!” Well, I think he got it!

Sometimes, it may be hard to decline a request when we look into their beautiful faces; yet as parents, we would be doing them a disservice by always consenting. Would we really be preparing them for life, if the answer were affirmative every time they asked for something? In my humble opinion, absolutely not!

We will be held accountable for the children God has entrusted to us. May we, as parents, seek His wisdom on when to say “yes”, as well as when to say “no”.

(This article was shared with my daughter’s awareness.) 



Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer


Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)

Available at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com in both paperback and eBook formats!




Booking Information
Please visit www.bridgetmccray.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 





Detour or End of the Road?

While on the way to teach a fitness class one morning, I was driving in the lane I normally use to get to the next highway. What I didn’t realize was that, due to construction, the traffic pattern had changed from the previous week. This meant the lane in which I was driving would no longer take me to where I wanted to go.

I felt frustrated because I’d missed my exit and knew I’d have to go farther than usual to get off the highway and get to the right path. I exited as soon as I could and pulled up my destination. The voice map said to turn left, yet my instinct said to do the opposite since that was the general direction I needed to go. 

I followed my gut, knowing there had to be an easier way to get to the correct highway and traveling in the right direction, which turned out to be the case. The detour took about ten minutes, yet I still arrived safely to my destination and was even 45 minutes early.

So…why did I share all of this? Life lessons, of course! I had to choose to:
1. Own the mistake (Having to make a detour for not paying closer attention)
2. Make the necessary adjustments, based on what I knew (General direction of my destination)
3. Follow my instinct (Actually, drive in the direction I “felt in my gut”)

As parents, are we willing to do these same things regarding our children:


1. Own the mistakes we make with them? Perhaps:
  • Not setting clear boundaries
  • Speaking to them as though they were less than human, in the name of “establishing authority” 
  • Ignoring them
  • Admitting that we’re learning too, and don’t always get it right
2. Make the necessary adjustments based on what we know? Maybe: 
  • Considering a change in our approach to communication to ensure they understand what we’re trying to convey
  • Discontinuing the notion of “that’s just how I’ve always done it”
  • Allowing them to respectfully have a voice
3. Follow our instinct? (For me, the Holy Spirit) 
  • Being willing to break traditions that are useless
  • Taking actions that may not make logical sense, but “something” inside says you should 

There is NO perfect parent on earth; that includes us. We ALL have room to grow, no matter the ages of our children. As long as we’re still breathing, there’s still time. What a blessing and a privilege to serve in this wonderful role, having opportunities to positively impact generations to come!

God has wonderful plans for His children for His glory. Be encouraged: A detour does not have to mean the end of the road! 
Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer

Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)

Available at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com in both paperback and eBook formats!


Booking Information
Please visit www.bridgetmccray.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 

Bridget McCray



Important Things?

Imagine a world where there were no broken children…a world in which no child suffered neglect at the hands of his (or her) own parents. “…but, I provide everything my child needs. He (or she) wants for nothing,” one might say.

Though the child may have every THING, would he have our focus if he needs to share a concern that a friend may harm himself, or would we be too busy looking at the big game or binge-watching our favorite show to listen?

Though the child may have every THING, could she tell of how she was selected to sing the solo in an upcoming play for which she auditioned, or would we be subtly distracted as we checked our various social media pages for the latest “news”?

There are so many people and things competing for our children’s attention. Yes, we provide things that they need, which is part of our parental responsibility. However, are we listening to them, I mean REALLY listening?

Do we take time to notice their body language, their facial expressions, and the tone of their voices when they try to talk to us? Is it possible that they just walk away, because we don’t even take the time to acknowledge their presence when they try to communicate with us?

Even as I write this, my heart is convicted, as I know I’ve been guilty of these things at one point or another. I want my children to know that they are loved and valued as part of our family. Besides the provision of basic life necessities, the “thing” our children need most is our time and attention. Would you agree?



Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer


Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)

Available at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com in both paperback and eBook formats!

Booking Information
Please visit www.bridgetmccray.com

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 



Broken

Imagine a world where there were no more broken children…a world in which no child ever had to endure the pain of his parents going through a divorce, never felt she had to question if she did something to make Daddy or Mommy go away, or experienced the feeling of “betraying” one parent because of having to live with the other.

Imagine a time in which there were no more broken children…a time when children were in an environment where there was transparency about both the joys the and challenges of relationships and were not “doomed” to repeat the mistakes of their parents without knowingly doing so.

Imagine a place where there were no more broken children…a place where before they existed, their parents came together in marriage only after much prayer, observation, and deep conversation, asking the hard questions about family history regarding relationships, finances, and other things, in an effort to avoid any destructive patterns that may have previously existed, in order to ensure a different and better future for generations to come.

Imagine…

Bridget McCray

Author and 2018 International Book Awards Finalist (Health: General category), H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)

Available on Amazon in both paperback and Kindle formats!

http://a.co/6QWpcgO

For speaking engagements, please contact Bridget through her website at www.bridgetmccray.com


Bridget McCray
Contributing Writer

Model P31 Moms by Bridget McCray 




Humble Pie!

The mom, who woke up early to take her son to an athletic camp, only to discover that the camp doesn't meet on Fridays, and her son says, "I tried to tell you, Mom," and she "rips him a new one," only to find out that he was correct, after she called her husband to verify what was on the flyer and realized that she did, indeed, overlook that important piece of information, then bursts into tears for "chewing out" her son for no reason: Yep! It was I!

This happened last summer, yet I can still see it as clearly as if it were yesterday. I cannot explain how incredibly small I felt in that moment. Immediately after hanging up with my husband, I apologized to our son and asked if he would please forgive me for what I'd just done. His response, without a hint of anger or frustration in his voice: "Yes, Ma'am."

What did I take away from that situation?

(1) Effective communication in any relationship is critical. We all want to be heard, but how often do we listen… really listen?

Our children are people, too. They want to be heard, as well. If we don’t actively listen to what they’re saying, it is likely that they will stop talking to us, telling us what’s in their hearts. Is that something we would truly want to happen? I know I wouldn’t!

Why was I so busy or distracted that I did not allow myself to stop and listen to what my son was trying to say? What a relief that there wasn’t something more serious he needed to voice at the time!

(2) I was reminded that since I have two ears and only one mouth, perhaps I should listen twice as much as I speak. Hmmm…

(3) I was able to reflect on how imperfect I am as a mom. Even more so, I couldn't help but reflect with gratitude that despite my imperfections, I am forgiven.

Thank you, Son, for being an example of one who extends forgiveness. Thank You, Father, for Your Son, Jesus, Who offers forgiveness for all who come to Him!

I will choose to put my active listening skills to work so my children will know that they can share their thoughts and concerns, whatever they may be, with me. Will you commit to doing the same?

Bridget McCray

Contributing Writer

Author, H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me)
Available now on Amazon in both paperback and Kindle formats!
http://a.co/6QWpcgO

Cindy's Featured Book of the Week - H.E.A.L.T.H.: It’s Not Rocket Science (My Journey to a Healthier Me) by Bridget McCray 


Does one of these statements describe you?

* “I would like to get healthier, but don’t really know where to begin.”

* “I have tried to take better care of myself, but it seems my efforts result in only short-term success, which is frustrating.”

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